7 Reasons I’ve Stopped Coming To Your Link Party

7 Reasons I've Stopped Coming to Your Link Party


I don’t usually blog about blogging because I’m pretty sure I’m not an expert. Like I can’t even add basic tags and all that good stuff. But I have been hanging around linky parties for awhile because I love seeing what other bloggers have been up to and making new friends. In addition to seeing what’s going on in the blogosphere, link parties are a great way to share your work with others and drive traffic to your blog.

I used to link up to lots of different parties but with the amount of crazy specialist appointments for the boys, furniture finishing, my own writing and all the other stuff going on over here, I pulled way back on the amount of time I’m linking up. If you’re looking to increase your links or see why your traffic is dwindling, here are a few reasons bloggers might not be linking up.


There are two major platforms for hosting a link party, InLinkz and Linky Tools. I’ve stopped participating in most parties that use Linky Tools simply because there are too many steps involved to link up. When you want to link more than one post, you have to start all over from the beginning. InLinkz is a one page, easy click and link and when you link another post, it just opens the form again, rather than sending you back to the original party page. When I was looking for a party to co-host, I avoided any using Linky Tools. I still link up to one or two because I feel a real connection to the host but that’s about it.


I understand the need for most bloggers to use pop ups because everyone swears they’re key to increasing your mailing list. I’ve gone back and forth about installing them but I’m still holding out. Maybe it’ll happen one day so I don’t want to be too judgy. I can live with one pop up on your site but if I have to deal with one every time I click to a new page, I’m out of there. For example, if you’ve truncated your post so that I click the “Read More” button to go the party and a new page with another pop up shows up, it’s just plain annoying. I also wish there was a way for pop ups to recognize those of us that have already subscribed. I find this so frustrating that sometimes I want to unsubscribe just because of the irritation factor.


Usually this happens when there are so many hosts, all of whom are sharing what they posted this week and/or their own personal features that the party is almost too hard to find. Scrolling down for pages isn’t cool and I don’t think it does the features any justice either. It’s just clutter at that point.


I’m not a rule follower so maybe this is just me but too many rules has started to send me packing. I get the need to follow the host, I think that’s just polite actually. I also don’t like to link and run so I do spend time visiting other bloggers. But adding all sorts of other hoops and bells and whistles and it starts to become too much. Like the other day when I saw someone had added that to be featured I need to visit the two before me and the two after me. First, that means I need to come back later to see who linked up after me. Secondly, I’m not going to visit someone just because they happened to get there before me. That becomes meaningless, particularly if I don’t like what they posted. I do think some rules are important since things can get out of hand. If you’re a food blogger and you only want food posts, that’s a rule that I get. Keeping things family friendly…totally get that, too. But if I have to vote on the week before, sign up for email, and you want the blood of a virgin and my first born, I’m probably not right for that kind of party.

And maybe it’s my OCD or need for things to be pretty but I’m also considering removing myself from parties that insist that I add their link to my post. I’m still doing it because I’ve been linking up with some hosts for a long time but I think it looks kind of tacky and unprofessional at the bottom of every post. I need to figure that one out.


Just like in real life, parties should be ready to go when guests arrive. It’s not possible for people to keep checking back in to see if the party has started. I keep a list of when parties start. A few are never on time. Like never. After awhile, that gets old. Guests shouldn’t have to chase a host to hang out with them.

A couple of weeks ago, I actually saw that someone had posted their party early. I thought that was cool until I realized that the post was up but the link ups were scheduled for later. Hey, accidents happen. I have been know to accidentally hit publish when I meant to hit save. But when your email triggers me to pop over and the links aren’t working for hours, it’s pretty inconvenient. When it happened again this week, I took the party off of my list.


I know life gets busy and crazy but when you start skipping weeks because life got in the way, it discourages bloggers from attending. It’s one thing to be busy and skip features with the promise that there’ll be double features next week but when the party gets missed all together you’re losing trust with your readers. I usually hang around for awhile longer but when it happens more than a few times, I delete your party from my list.


I love reading blogs and I’ll come back week after week to see what you’re up and to link up but if I’m suddenly on a mailing list that I didn’t ask for, I feel tricked and used. I know the link parties are about traffic but it’s cheating to add someone to a mailing list when they just wanted to visit and link up. I don’t mind an email reminder that you’re party is starting but anything I didn’t ask for is just spammy.

The bottom line is link parties need to be user friendly. Too much flash, too many distractions, inconsistency, and too many rules make the party a flop and people will stop coming. Parties, real and linky, should be fun. What do you think? Got any link party pet peeves?


7 Reasons Bloggers Won't Visit Your Link Party

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  1. Hi Jenna. I’m so sorry. I said that about the visiting but I didn’t mean you had to do that to be featured. I was just trying to encourage some who DO link and run (and there are quite a few), to visit others. Also I did not do features one or two weeks, as I truly had a family crisis to dreadful to discuss on a public blog one week, and my daughters dance concert the other. I did follow up with double features. I am genuinely sorry if I disappointed you as I thought with our joint trials with special needs kids, that we had a nice bloggy friendship developing. I can only imagine you’re referring to me. As far as I am aware I am the only person to have done those two things. I feel really awful. I am sorry. Sometimes blogging is just hard work ;(

    • Mimi, I was in no way referring to you!!! I love partying with you! Blogging is hard work and it’s hard to balance everything, particularly when there are special needs kids involved. The ones I’ve been referring to have actually already been removed from my list. This little rant was also a reminder to me to keep my own blog party fun and real. I enjoy your blog, your party, and our connection. I’m so sorry if you thought this was meant for you. And, yes, linking and running is like dining and dashing…totally agree 🙂

  2. I have to agree with you!! Another thing I do not care for that I see a lot in blogging, The same people that get featured in one link party get featured on several other link parties!! Anyway, have a great week!!

    • Popular posts are like popular girls at high school….they’re everywhere, lol. Picking features is hard and I know I’ve picked some that have been featured everywhere else. I try to pick features from newer bloggers when I can. I do see a pattern when I start visiting the posts looking for features….often times, I’ve featured them before. You’ve given me something to thank about…thanks!

  3. I suffer through some of them, but I mostly agree. 🙂

    However – I do like the Blog Booster party, and she asks us to visit, and preferably comment on, the post just before, as well as visit a second page on that same site. At first I was confused, and then I realized that it helps our bounce rates so much. So I’ve been trying to do that with every blog post I visit.

  4. Thanks for your honest opinion! I’ll be honest too…I’ve never really *gotten* link parties. I mean, I know that they’re an opportunity to share posts, and read others’ posts, but I’ve heard so many times that link parties are essential for growing blog traffic, and I’ve never seen any boosts in traffic from ones I’ve participated in. Maybe it works if you’re linking on a huge blog and getting there right at the beginning so your post isn’t buried? But I don’t think I have the patience or organization for that right now 🙂 I do enjoy finding others’ blogs and “sharing the love” but I prefer to do it through comment shares…ones that allow you to choose posts that interest you.

    • I agree! I don’t think it drives a huge amount of traffic but when I was new, it did help a lot. Now I link up because I like to support the link party host and because I do love seeing what everyone’s been up to.

      • I recently added a pop up and I have to say it works. I went from approximately one hundred subscribers to six hundred in about a month. I get the occasional unsubscribe but my list continues to grow. I would however like to change it so that it doesn’t pop up right away. I’ll do that as soon as I can figure out how I got it there to begin with! LOL

  5. I enjoyed reading your peeves, Jenna, I do agree that pop ups are beyond annoying, and inconsistency in the parties drives me crazy! I only link to parties that are time convenient to me, and that always launch on time. I exit blogs quickly that jump around and constantly reload. If a blog is monetized, it is a job and there is no excuse for inconsistency and life getting in the way excuses. Everyone is busy, I am insulted when a blogger uses that excuse. I feel that blog is a commitment and a choice, if a blogger can’t cut it, stop and quit whining about it! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and letting me rant along with you!

    • I set our party for scheduling in advance but I know that life does happen and tech mistakes happen. I just showed up at a party tonight that goes live at 7pm….still not up. Just like last week and the week before. That part I don’t get since it’s pretty easy to schedule posts in advance. That party just got deleted from the list which is too bad because I like the blog.

  6. Much of this is why I stopped blogging altogether for a while. And your comment above about popular blogs = popular girls from high school – YES. And many were mean girls, too! Glad to see there are plenty of other bloggers with compassion, and who expect the same! New follower here! 🙂

    • Thanks, Jona! Blogging is hard work and we need to be kind to each other. I felt a bit mean writing this post but I felt like I needed to share my thoughts. The other reason was to remind me of how I want my own link party to be….fun and full of companionship 🙂

  7. Agree with a lot of what you wrote. I especially don’t like all the clutter and pop ups. I have scaled back on participating in link ups because I just don’t always have the time and also I never really saw a whole lot of comments or traffic from it. I try and do it a few times a week. I found your post at the Show and Tell Link party.

    • The pop ups make me the craziest. The other thing I forgot to mention is that some bloggers have redesigned their blogs with slide shows and all sorts of fancy things that I can barely find the party any more….Add that to the clutter section, I guess? Thanks for commenting.

  8. I’ve thought many times of writing a post similar to yours. If I do I’ll be posting one about the party guests too. 🙂 You brought out lots of good points. One other thing that makes me wish for a better host is oftentimes the host or hosts don’t comment at all. I know some parties are beyond the efforts of just one person (that’s when getting another hostess or scaling back the number of links allowed is appropriate), but when there are multiple hosts I don’t think there is any excuse for not having one of them visit your post and thanking you for joining their party – even if the post is not up to your preferences. That is rude. That’s why I like parties like Wonderful Wednesday, Anything Goes, Merry Monday, WAYWOW, SHINE, and a couple others. The hostesses almost always leave a comment. And Wonderful Wednesday is one of the biggest ones out there!

    This comment is going on forever. Sorry. I noticed you host Best of the Weekend. Weekends are hard for me to link up, but I will make a point of adding you to my list. It’s apparent you want to be a good hostess, and I know you have good stuff because I’ve visited you before through other link ups. 🙂 Found you on Creative Muster. Sharing this and following on G+ and Pinterest!

    • I love your comment! I always thought that when I hosted, I would visit and comment on everyone’s posts. Until I hosted and realized that it’s beyond impossible to visit hundreds of posts each week and make meaningful comments. I do a lot of post sharing via twitter and on facebook but I’m not sure guests are aware of that. I always comment on my features and if it’s a quieter week, I try to make some rounds. If I feature someone, I follow them on social media in some way as well. Saying how I would host often reminds me of how I talked about parenting until I actually had kids….live and learn lol. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts

  9. I feel you on this! I’ve been cleaning up my link party list lately and a lot of this things cause me to quit joining parties. I hate when parties use anything other than InLinkz! Right now I’m only joining one party that doesn’t but it’s because the host is always so sweet to come by and comment every time I link up.

    • Same! If I have a connection with the host then nothing else really matters. Which makes sense because that’s what a party should be about 🙂

  10. Are you a mindreader? You are saying just what I have been thinking about link parties. I do understand the need for some rules, I don’t link book reviews on crafty link parties for example, but when it becomes a chore to link up I stop attending.

    • Rules and guidelines that make sense are a good idea. Rules that have us jumping through hoops are just exhausting and remind me of my former day job….lots of committees to make lots of rules that no one understands or follows lol

  11. I agree with all of these. Linky Tools can be annoying if you’re adding multiple posts. I try to be nice and follow the basic rules – following the host if I can, although, honestly, sometimes it’s really hard just to follow some blogs. I’m on WordPress and I like to read blogs on my reader or on Bloglovin but when I have to sign up for a bunch of things just to follow you, it gets discouraging.

    • So true! I follow on Bloglovin because I like getting the daily posts. Sometimes I follow on other social media sites but following on everything just gets kind of redundant.

  12. Hi, i agree mostly. I use inlinkz for the same reasons you listed. I host a weekly hop called Literacy Musing Mondays and recently asked everyone to read the post next to them plus one more. If I don’t a lot of folks get neglected and not even read as part of the hop. I understand time constraints, though. I hope you will check out our linkup if you have time. Thanks. 🙂

  13. I totally agree with all your comments (well perhaps not the link back, I don’t mind that – it’s only fair). If you are asking too much and it’s too much effort then I won’t bother again.

    Sally @ Life Loving

    • I struggle with the link back thing because I totally see why hosts would like that. What I usually do is add the “Linking to” info at the bottom of the post but then I do go back and remove it after a week of linking. It’s my OCD at work lol

      • That is a great idea! The bottoms of my posts are saved for link parties but deleting them after I’ve exhausted my party list is a good idea. Now for entering them in a link party tracker before I do so I can reference neglected posts in the future. So much to do!

  14. My biggest pet peeves are link dumping and then they’re gone, and usually the link dropped is irrelevant to the theme or what not.

    I also dislike the shady or tricky ways people sign you up for their newsletter. It should be an option, because no, I don’t want to be added to your list unless I indicate I do. Thanks.

    I touched a bit on my “things that drive me insane” post I published today.

    Thanks for sharing. 🙂 #WAYWON

  15. Hello Jenna,
    Thank you for posting about this topic; I appreciate your perspective. I, too, often feel reluctant to join some parties out there. And, yes, a link-back at the bottom of one’s post sort of cheapens the integrity and of it and adds unnecessary clutter. I elected to create a separate party link page; this way readers can simply click on that page to find out what parties I am currently participating in. I also feel that there are bloggers out there that have self nominated themselves in a hierarchy fashion, and have nominated others as fans. I am nobody’s fan; I think of blogging like a musicians’ jam session, with each performer taking a solo moment, then taking a step back to let others do their thing. Pop-ups are rude, as are demands to join, sign up, etc…. I would hope that if my blog made a positive impression on a reader then they would visit it again of their own free will and on their own convenient time. If one wants to join a popularity contest, I suggest they should go back to high school. Thank you for the thoughtful post.


    • I like that high school analogy and the jam session!, too!! I think it’s important to remember who we’re writing for. I want to connect with other bloggers but I also want to write for readers who are not blogging and just looking for inspiration and ideas. Isn’t that how we all got started? Then again, I’ve never been the popular girl so maybe I’m off…Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  16. Thank you for saying everything that’s been on my mind! I’m thinking about creating a linkup because I can’t find any in my niche, and I will have to keep these in mind if I do. I can’t forget about the experience *I* would like to have if I were participating in the linkup. Great post! 🙂

  17. Hi Jenna, I enjoyed reading this post because it’s mostly how I feel of some link parties I attend. I appreciate the bloggers hosting because I can only imagine it’s lots of work. I do am a hit and run at times, simply because I live in Europe and I try not to be always the last one coming to the party because of the time change. Then, in those moments it’s often not possible for me to go through all the links and send some blog love out, so I either come back later and do so, or I forget. I added a Linky Page on my blog where I added all the parties I attend each day and then put a simple:” I’m sharing this at my favourite Link parties” with a link to my party page on the bottom of my post. I think that’s fair, it just got out of hand adding each button each party each day…

    • It really does get out of hand when you have to add all of the other blogs that don’t feel that a link up page is good enough. I put a link party page in a few years ago and I’ll never forget the woman that emailed me to say she would have featured my post but I didn’t link back to her in my post. Seriously. She was on my party page but that wasn’t good enough. Needless to say she wasn’t on my page after that and I didn’t bother to go back.

      • Hahaha, guess we met the same person on the web! Got that email, too!
        That woman’s party disappeared from my Link Up Page immediately. I’m not pleased by that sort of blackmail.

        Love this post!

  18. Thanks so much for your post. I agree with everything you said especially the pop ups and sneaky subscription part! I host a link party and will definitely consider shortening our rules:). Have a great weekend and take care, Tara

  19. I love linkys but I definitely agree about all your points – I only link to a few parties that are low on rules and feature stuff in my “niche” – it seems pointless to me to link to a food or craft blog because neither of those are my strengths. Thanks for saying what a lot of us think!

    • For sure….Some blogs are inclusive of whatever you’ve posted which is nice but I also totally get food and craft blogs being exclusive. Thanks for coming by and sharing your thoughts.

  20. I totally agree with this list! I try to link up to many parties, but I also want to do things right. (I’m more of a rule follower than you are, I guess.) So if there are too many rules I just quit linking there.

    As for the pop ups… I never understand them. Sometimes I click to a blog I’ve never seen before from, say, Pinterest and immediately am asked to sign up for a mailing list. It’s like having someone ask you to move in with them when you only just met them. I have no idea if I want to buy into what you’re selling yet! I haven’t even read anything on your blog! I don’t see how they work, either. But they must!

    Anyway, linking up to blogs takes a whole lot of time and effort, so I’ve really been trying to focus my efforts on linkys that are simple to use and lean towards my demographic better.

    Hmm…I think you hit some pet peeves here I didn’t realize I had! Sorry for writing a book in your comment section! haha

    • Omg! I think that’s the best metaphor ever!!! It’s exactly how I feel…I’m interested in your pin now stop stalking me. Jeez. Just as an aside about pop ups ..I signed up on an email list last week because of a couple of good pins that kept leading me back. She was very pop up heavy and although I was annoyed, she led me in with access to blogging information that’s only available when you sign up….Holy hell, she emails like 4 times a day. Spammy, creepy, stalking. That ended quickly. It’s like you said…Manners, get to know each other etc….Just because we’re behind a computer screen is no reason to forget good etiquette. Now I’m on a pet peeves rant…lol. Loved your comments.

  21. Thanks for putting this out there! I do agree with you on almost all of these. I too have gone back and forth with popups for my sight. I’m holding out because it’d have to be a REALLY smart popup for me to sign on. If someone’s already signed up for my mailing list, I want to be sure they don’t still see the popup every time they visit! Thanks for sharing at #SmallVictoriesSundayLinkup!

  22. I enjoyed reading your post today, and I co-host Small Victories Link up with Tanya. I know she has some developed some rules in place. I am like you on most all of these points. I have found myself being subscribed to things without my knowing I subscribed to anything and I agree on banners and all of that. If I link up to a party, I don’t do it either. I try to go to at least 25 blogs in the weekly link-up, and I pick one to feature based on what caught my attention.

    Glad you linked up with us again this week.

    • Thanks for visiting and sharing your thoughts with us. You are great hosts! I think some rules make sense but it’s when there are too many and all those pop ups that my eyes glaze over. See you next Sunday.

  23. I agree, I enjoy taking party in link parties but don’t like all the rules or finding that a party is late or doesn’t happen at all. Another issue for me is the fact that most of the parties I join are in the States and start in the evenings local time. Being in the UK means they start when I’m asleep so by the time I get there my contribution is buried under other links. It also means I have to wade through so many links to find something interesting.

    • I was thinking about my blog friends who live in the UK and Australia and wondering how you even keep up with it all. I mess up simple time changes all the time and I’m in Canada/US. Thanks for visiting and sharing your thoughts.

  24. I am going on 14 weeks at Learning From Each Other… I totally agree with you… I have been trying to condense – condense to make everything user-friendly and short as possible to make the party fun and easy. I hope if you’ve joined you have enjoyed. And if I was a part of this post I”m sorry 🙁 I do add my linkers to a list but it’s only to the “link is live” list…

    • I like the Link is Live idea a lot and I have no problem with that list….it’s super helpful since I’m a little on the disorganized side at home (I like to blame my boys lol). So when you’re email pops up to remind of the party, that’s pretty dang cool. You were NOT part of this post 😉

  25. I’m new to blogging so still trying to work out linkies. I took part in one and got a re-tweet from the host but didn’t really notice a difference in traffic. I already understand the one about rules though… I had to keep them open on my phone whilst working on my computer so I could go through like a massive check list! Seems very complicated for something than may make no difference to the site whatsoever!

    • If I hadn’t been such a crazy blog reader, I wouldn’t even know what a link party was lol. I still love the parties, just not the drama. Thanks so much for popping over to share your thoughts.

  26. I love that there are so many comments on this post, I spent time the other day reading some of them, I need to read some more, I love hearing what people say, I like easy linkups and I want to make mine as easy as possible. I hope the time they spend at the linkup is spent reading others links! That’s what we do them for, right? Well, that’s why I do mine. One of the reasons. I do it to build community and yes, I do it for the pageviews too. But my biggest beef with linkups is that they are only done for the pageviews, as a host I feel that I should be giving back as much as I get. So I Pin, share, comment and now I am making the Pinterest Board a group board. I want all of us to prosper, not just me. But on to your points I so agree, InLinz is the way to go, Linky Tools is too much work! Make it easy! I agree with popups, no popups! I’m sorry that you aren’t a fan of the “Read More” button, I have a hard time with blogs that aren’t, so much time is wasted if I don’t want to read the whole post and most are very difficult to navigate. The read more button makes things so much easier to find, IMHO. I try to keep the rules of my party minimal, I agree once you have to do too many things I quit. This is supposed to be fun and easy! I didn’t have a button for my party until many were asking for one, I hate the way they look at the bottom of my posts. I enter 25+ parties a week and if a Brand were to come look at my blog it looks so sloppy at the end of posts. I wish buttons were never created, and Google doesn’t look kind on them anyway, so, I’m going to look into my linkup and see what I can do to stream line it more, I love the group that comes to play and want to keep them happy! Thanks for posting this, really great points!! I hope most agree with you.

    • Nikki, you’re party is one of my favorites and you’re amazing in your ability to reach out, comment, and share all of your posts. Seriously amazing!! I have no issues at all with the “read more” button…my issue is with hitting the button and then having another pop up in my face on the next page. Love your party….see you next week at #waywow

      • Phew!!! I’m glad that we’re good, if you noticed I did change several things about the linkup, and I hope it makes it better for everyone. Thanks for writing the post, I loved it! Congrats on being the most viewed and for all the response you’ve gotten, much deserved!

  27. I so appreciated reading this and agreed with you on all of these! I’m a co-hostess of Snickerdoodle Sunday and thankfully, I think our link party escapes most if not all of these! We may not be the most sophisticated party with our graphics, fonts, etc., BUT I think ours is pretty clean, uncluttered, and thankfully inklinkz. 🙂

    Sarah (Sadie Seasongoods)

    • Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I visit your party every week 🙂 I’m starting to notice that the most sophisticated parties are the ones that I’ve stopped attending. I think I like smaller and more “comfy” places, too.

  28. OOOM BOY…I could have written your post myself. I love blogging and have done it since 2007…I also use a lot of party linkups because I like the bloggers. Of everything you say here, it is the popups and so many ads that make the blog hard to read…it jumps, rolls, pauses…I have taken so many parties off my list because they are just too hard.
    and nothing makes me madder than to link a blog party in my post only to find there’s no party this week.
    May I ask if I could repost your post on MY blog (linking back to you)..?? You have covered just about everything that is stressing me out blogging. If so, THANKS…if not, I’ll just try to do one like it.
    Have a great week…:)

  29. I have deleted many parties from my party list for the same exact reasons. A couple additional pet peeves that I have are when the pictures are so little that you need a magnifying glass to see them or when you have to click through page after page to see all of the posts that have linked up. I host a party not for my own selfish reasons but to help other bloggers get recognition for their hard work. When someone attends the party I want them to easily be able to link up, easily SEE all of the other creative things that are being linked up not have to waste valuable time to attend.
    **P.S. – As for the weekly features, I pick the link that got the most views that week. My audience knows better than I what is worthy of being featured.

    • Robin, that’s probably why I link up with you ;). We do the same thing….our feature is picked by our readers and then we each add other posts that we liked.

  30. Excellent points! I think I’ll update our rules to not require a link back. I don’t enforce it any way. (Actually I don’t even know what our rules say, so clearly I’m not enforcing them.) Some of us have been hosting a party so long (almost 4 years) that the rules were written long ago. It’s great to get the perspective of the person linking up.

    • Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts…I love that you don’t know what your rules say lol.I feel like that’s how I parent sometimes. 😉 Have a great week!

  31. I think you are the student who asked the question that everyone in the class was scared to ask but glad that you had the courage to! I am not a popular blog by any means, but I have muttered those same peeves that you have. I feel like all I do sometimes is hit the X to delete the pop up. My email is full enough. If I really want to follow a blog I save their blog to my blog list so it’s always on my sidebar. Linking back to each party is also a lot of work when I already have their party listed on my Party Page, so I feel like I should just delete that page altogether. The other thing is some parties are SO large that I won’t even participate. I can’t even imagine having to look at 600 blog posts and pick three features from it all. Thank you for your bravery and maybe there will be some changes in blogland. Have the most wonderful week! Diane

    • I stopped following by email awhile ago since there’s already too much to keep up with. Bloglovin is my favorite way to follow blogs I like. I took a good long hard look at the biggie blogs and started to pay attention to whether or not I’ve ever been featured, a host has ever taken the time to visit, or anyone actually visits from their party. If the answer is no, I’ve stopped linking up but will continue to follow them and read their posts. The real test for me comes when I visit other posts on their site and comment and no one ever responds. I know life is busy but if that’s a consistent pattern then I’m probably done with them. Harsh, right? But we’re all busy. Thanks for not being hate mail 😉

  32. Nice list! I think you said what needs to be said. I’ve stopped visiting some blogs all together because of some of the practices you just mentioned, not to mention all the blog parties/hops I stopped participating in. I get that many bloggers rely on their income and that ads/popups/etc. are part of that, but when you start losing readers/visitors because it has becoming overwhelming, it is time to cut back.

  33. You said it so well. This reminds me of a similar post I posted two weeks ago about being a great host on a linky and we share the same thoughts, especially about being late. As a blogger who loves a really good linky, my absolute pet peeve is when the host is so inconsistent and often times late to their own party. Like you, I have a list of linkys and the times they start, and nothing irks me more than hitting refresh on a page several times before finding their live link. I’m so glad you and I share that (among other things) about joining/not joining a linky. So happy I’m not the only one that feels this exact way. Thanks for sharing, Jenna! Definitely a valuable post for anyone to read 🙂 So glad I found you on Titus 2 Tuesdays

  34. I stopped over from T2T because I’m a hostess and wanted to be sure I wasn’t driving people away. So far, it looks like my party is okay, and I’ve actually stopped linking up with some people for all of those same reasons. Especially the rules one. I actually had a hostess contact me because I didn’t visit 2 other blogs on time. Great post!!!! (oh and mine is on Wednesdays, in case you would like to stop over….but no pressure. *grin* )

    • Wow! Someone took the time to discipline you for not getting to other blogs on time. Mind blown! Thanks for the invitation, I’ll be sure to stop by on Wednesday.

  35. Hi, Jenna! As a new blogger and co-host I can’t agree more with you, and I can’t stand 5 and 6. Living in Europe is difficult enough to get in time with most of the parties, but having to chase the host or skip from blog to blog (when a group party) to check if there’s party this week is more than annoying.
    And regarding pop up, please don’t hate me… I use it. I try it to be the less invasive as possible, but it has helped me to get more subscribers
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts, as you can see you’re not alone.

  36. Hi there Jenna! I found you on the I Should be Mopping the Floor linky party. First off, looking at your picture, I seriously thought you were younger than me! You look barely old enough to have 2 young kids, let alone 2 grandkids!!! You look amazing!!! Anywho, I am brand spankin new to the whole linky party thing. As I’m trying to find parties that are appropriate for my niche (health and fitness), I am already steering clear of the ones that require you link back to their site. However, when you do link up to a party asking that you do that, do you just place their badge at the bottom of your post? I tried looking at a few other blogs for examples, but I couldn’t find any badges anywhere:-/ Great post Jenna. Thanks so much!

    • Hi Katie,
      I posted a comment earlier on, but have been keeping up with reading others’ comments. I elected to create a separate page for listing links to other sites; this way I was able to maintain the integrity and “look” of my individual blog posts. However, I’ve added badges to the bottom of my post in the past and found that some transferred without a glitch, but some of them were not set up correctly and I was unable to do so. I ultimately ditched doing it all together. From what I understand, it is more an advantage to the site from where that badge originates, though I’m not tech savvy enough to explain why this is so.

      • Thanks so much for your sweet comments, Katie!

        Let’s be honest, my blog photo is from 2008 and the boys were born in 2011 and 2012. Every picture of me taken since then has me looking exhausted and ancient and vanity won’t allow me to use those photos, lol. I’m definitely not doing the health and fitness thing at all these days.

        I do a “sharing this post here” link at the bottom of my post. Badges didn’t work for me at all….tech challenged and all that good stuff. Plus they slow your page down and look all cluttery.

    • I stopped using the badges/buttons almost immediately since they take up so much space, slow your page from loading, and are just not attractive. At the bottom of my posts, I usually had Sharing HERE (links to my link party page) and then add the few that I still link to that require a link back. I’m so tech challenged that it’s embarrassing and this was the way I could make it work. I go back a few weeks later and remove the “sharing here” links at the bottom just to keep things tidy. Hope that helps 🙂

  37. Such a timely post for me! I’m sitting here, no joke, with a list of link parties in front of me, trying to figure out when I need to be on my computer to link and which parties require me to link back to their parties and wondering if a “I Link to’ page would be enough (after reading through these posts I’m thinking not!😒). I’m fairly new to blogging and really wondering if jumping through these hoops is really the best use of my time. Wouldn’t my time be better served working on great content?! But then, as a new blogger, how do I get my new content noticed if not through these parties? ARGHHHH!
    It does seem that I entered the blogging world a bit late, that the civility and camaraderie that so many bloggers refer to has passed by. Sadness 😢
    Your post has given me much to think about. Thanks for taking the time, and the chance, to write it.

    • I’m beyond tech challenged so even creating an excel spread sheet was too much for me. I made a simple document in Google docs with three “columns” and I use that term loosely…time the party starts, name of blog, and then a note on the side ie requires a link back in post, furniture only, no round ups…..etc. It took a good couple of days of research to get things straight but it works well for me. If I even printed it out, I would lose it in no time. As things chug along, I just delete the parties that don’t work for me, add new ones, make new notes etc. Hope that helps. I also use google analytics to see where my traffic is coming from. I was really surprised to learn that most of the parties I go to, don’t lead to any traffic. I still participate to support the host and to meet new bloggers and see the posts because I just enjoy doing that.

      And I completely agree….I started blogging in 2012 and things felt a lot smaller and friendlier back then. The link parties that I started attending did help build my blog but content is always the most important. Some of those link parties are so huge that it’s pretty out of control and I’ve stopped participating.

      Whew! Feel like I wrote another post, lol. Hope this is helpful. Have a great weekend.

  38. Some times, someones needs to say the hard things! 🙂 I agree with you on all of these. I do enjoy link parties. They are full of inspiration, a great way to meet other bloggers with similar interest, and some really do drive a lot of traffic to my blog. But I’ve stopped visiting blogs that have all the pop-ups, or if they start on one I’m new too, I quickly exit! Some even have pop-ups attached to the individual pictures. Try getting through that entire post! ha! Anyhow, thanks for sharing your thoughts! ~Rhonda

    • I love what one of the readers above, (Jamie @ Medium Sized Family) said…it’s like going on a first date and the guy wants to move in. Ummm….how about we just get to know each other first before I decide if I want to move in. Or subscribe. Same deal, lol.

      • That’s such a good point; why on earth would someone subscribe on the spot. There’s no integrity or discernment with the action. I don’t make it a practice to subscribe to sites; I have my favorites memorized in my head and visit them when my time allows…….and they’re certainly not ones strewn with ads and pop-ups. If I wanted ads and pop-ups I could just go to a newsstand and buy a magazine off the rack. Sometimes I feel many bloggers are doing just that, rather than sticking to their personal contribution and creative makings. Well then, they’re just attempting to being on-line magazine.

  39. Hi! Nice article! I especially loved your picture of the empty party chair with the balloon! I am new to blogging, so I didn’t know if it was just me that felt some of these irritations (especially the pop-ups). Nice to see you on #titus2tuesday

  40. I’m the same way. I would add, too, when you want to comment and a hostess (or another blogger) has tons of hoops to jump through just to say “Hi, Great Post”, I jump ship. I don’t want to have to sign up with their blog host service or log into Facebook or google to post a comment. This is especially frustrating when the party stipulation is to “comment on” 2 other blogs!

    • Absolutely! I tried to share one of my own readers posts for our weekend features but couldn’t do it because I couldn’t find a way to comment or to share the picture. It just turned into a “Pin me” pop up….Sometimes we make things way harder than they need to be!

  41. Another blogger told me about your post and I had to come over and check it out. Well said and I agree with you on so many points. As for the same links being featured all over at the same time…a testament that they’re dang good posts and deserve the recognition! I’m glad you opened the dialogue because for the longest time I thought it was just me being annoyed by some of these points.

    • I’m still a little stunned by how many other people are feeling the same way…I really thought there would be hate mail or something lol. I’d been thinking about doing a few other blogging posts but have held back because I’m really not an expert about blogging. Like I can’t work anything on my own site half the time….for real. Who knew that I wasn’t alone with those little pet peeves? Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment 🙂

  42. I am a new blogger and was just looking up what link parties are and how they work. So glad I found your post! Now when I find a link party, I am going to think twice before joining.

    • Link parties are a good way to get your work out there but are also a great way to get to know a host and other bloggers. They should be fun and friendly. Thanks for reading and sharing your comments.

  43. I hate pop ups! Oh my goodness, I thought I was the only one that did, this post and the comments are making me feel very much NOT alone! haha! I know EVERYONE says it’s the way to build your list, but I just haven’t been able to do it! I was waiting for the end of your post to give us a list of your favorite link parties… maybe a follow up? Of course as a co-host to a link party, I have been hoping that we weren’t “one of those’ that you’ve banned. (EEK!) This is truly helpful, it gives bloggers something to think about for sure.
    Blessings to you Jenna!

    • Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! I’m thinking about doing a follow up but I still struggle a bit with the whole idea that I know anything about blogging. The popularity of this post has really surprised me. Chellie, I love your party! The idea to do an archive link up is simply awesome!

  44. This is good, so very good. I read this post and then got lost in your many other posts. Your personal story is fascinating, and I just kept going into your archives. Thank you for sharing your life experiences with your boys and for keepin’ it real. I appreciate that.
    Rita C at Panoply

    • The only thing I know how to do is keep it real. Except for my blog photo, lol, which is pre-second family 😉 and probably the last time I looked that relaxed. Thanks for visiting and reading and sharing your comments, Rita.

  45. Hi Jenna. Stopping by from Fluster’s Creative Link Party – congrats on being featured, and thanks for sharing with us! This is a great post and I completely agree with you on all levels! Btw, your profile picture is beautiful and you look way too young to have grown children and grandchildren. 🙂


    • Thank you so much for visiting and your kind words, Heather! I really need to update my picture, lol. That was pre-boys ;)….I look way less relaxed and have no time to get my roots (all grey) touched up quite as often. (Actually, ever these days).

  46. Brilliant post! The link parties I join up to have gradually grown over the last six months and I think there does come a time when you need to assess which ones are really worth the time and effort. I’m visiting from #WOYWOW and personally think Nikki’s got it spot on – you really feel that she enjoys it and wants you to get something out of it. Lately I’ve been feeling that a lot of hosts really are just in it to get the page views and you get very little in return other than lots of ‘rules’ to benefit them. I haven’t come across your blog before but I’m going to have a good read! Thanks for sharing x

    • Nikki is the bomb and I have no idea how she keeps up with everything! We try to keep our party simple and rule free. I hope when folks link, they take time to see other’s posts but I’m not going to demand things from people that came to party. Thanks so much for coming by and sharing your thoughts with us.

  47. Phew! Sorry to clog your comment section with mine as well but this is a freakin’ awesome post!! Found you through #WAYWOW and totally agree with you on all but one point. The one point I’d never skip to add is my “jump” or “break” because it keeps my blog archive short and organized 😉 I just started hosting a link party (it’s going into its fifth week, yay!) and love to learn how to make it better!! Again, thanks for posting this!!

    • I was so relieved when I migrated from blogger to wordpress that the lovely woman I hired actually put the condensed posts together for me. Had no idea how to do that. I’m never opposed to having posts condensed, just to having to deal with popups each time I start a new page. BTW….just followed you on Bloglovin. Learning to sew is my mission this year and I love your site!

  48. This list of comments, and some replies, has got to be the longest I’ve met in the 4 years I’ve been blogging.

    Agree so much with many of them: especially the list of rules required to be met, and lack of responses from the Host/co-Hostesses. My bleat too is that coming in from the UK, I rarely – if ever – make it until I’m number 200 or more, and knowing how busy everyone is, cannot help but feel is it really worth the effort? How often does the hostess or her helpers actually get to that number each week?

    I’ve always been choosy as which blog I follow, and have never done more than 10 at any one time. I don’t have 48 hours to each day, even though I am a silver surfer, don’t now have a family to cater for, or work for someone else. Frequently wonder how on earth I managed to do all that and keep my sanity when I was in that position!!! I really need 48 hours to cope with what I try to do now – and don’t get it, unsurprisingly.

    These days, I think I link up with about 3 a week, as it’s question of what interests me in the subject matter being blogged about. Hoards of recipes kill my appetite, have to confess. Being a crafter, I tend to follow and read those – and those, like today’s feature, with something that gets my interest..

    I welcome being invited to a blog – rather than having it advertised as being open.

    Having said all that – I really appreciate the work Robin does to keep this blog going.

    Happy linking everyone. Hope my contributions help.

    • This is the most comments I’ve ever had, lol! Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! I love the term I just learned from you… “silver surfer”. I’d be a silver surfer if I wasn’t so involved with Miss Clairol 😉
      When the party posts are truncated ( I think that’s the word I’m looking for) into pages, after 200 links I don’t bother linking up any more. As a party host, we’ve kept our party “open” so that every post is seen by everyone. I can’t take bragging rights for that, the hosts did that long before I came along.

      And I have no idea how to manage the time change. I’m in awe that European bloggers even bother with us…I couldn’t even get it straight when it was just a 3 hour time change from a blogger in California. I had to make a note re what time the party opened in “my time.”

  49. Ahaha, I so agree about LinkyTools. And the clutter from 3453 hosts and their own posts plus their features. Features are great, but please make a collage. Lastly, I hate pop ups. Especially when the cross/X is half hidden.

  50. Awesome post! I’ve been attending link parties for years, and these were all ‘spot on’! Something that bugs the *blank* out of me (and I know people say it makes money for them, so I don’t begrudge them that, but it is still annoying as all get out), is ALL THE ADS EVERYWHERE ON THE SCREEN!!! The ‘artistry’, the clean ‘elegance’, the ‘individual’ look of the website is completely lost! Not to mention how flippin’ long it takes the site to load on my PC. If it weren’t for the party, I would NEVER go to these sites again. WHEW! That felt good, thanks for the opportunity to vent! 🙂 😉

    • Right? I finally decided that I wasn’t going to attend parties where that’s all I was doing. If the site wasn’t my thing or was ridiculously annoying, it wasn’t worth it to me to go. I want to link up with bloggers that I like and who’s posts are appealing to me. Thanks for commenting!

  51. I love this post! But in defense of myself I schedule all ny parties to open at the right time. The last two weeks that schedule didn’t trigger and I wasn’t home to check for an hour and a half. I still feel awful! The rest of your points I agree with fulky.

    • Technology fails sometimes. At least it does for me. A lot. I get mistakes because I make a ton of them. Like the time I “scheduled” something to post but it went live and I didn’t know it for over a day. A half written post with no pics, lol. My complaint was more about people that forget or miss weeks or post with no actual link that’s gone live. Late happens because life and technology happen. Have a great weekend!

  52. Wow. I feel really honored that you visit and link to our party! Many of the things you mention are right on the money, especially the rules thing. A few years ago there were rules for every party. Then the “no rules” party started, I believe, with Evelyn at My Turn for Us> She said she has no rules to join her party. I thought that was amazing since I’d been through “hoops” to join some parties and it’s frustrating so our party is a NO RULES party (Theresa from Shoestring Elegance is co-host). We don’t have clutter. We try to visit every link but if not every link, at least every blogger. We share on our large social media because I think it’s great to have all these awesome things to share. We don’t have to search around the internet for awesomeness. We have a party full of it! We always open exactly at 1oP.M. on Thursday evenings and it’s very rare that we don’t have 12 features every week, that get pinned and shared. Thank you for joining us. Your friend, Linda

    • Linda, I’m a shameless stalker of your blog and I link up with you almost every week. I think it’s impossible to visit and comment on every link especially when parties get bigger. I try to share most links on social media and just decided this week that I’d be following every blogger via some form of social media (I’m on an Instagram binge right now lol) who gets featured on my blog at our joint link party. I totally agree with you about link parties… they are terrific for meeting new bloggers and sharing “awesomeness”. Stalk you on Thursday 🙂

  53. As a link party host and someone who frequently participate in them, I couldn’t agree more with your points.
    Another pet peeve for me is when I HAVE TO add a link to the party on my post. Because I participate in many link parties, adding them all to my posts started to be a sore to the eyes. We all love backlinks and I do everything I can to promote those who join my party, but forcing them into it is as bad as adding them to a mailing list that didn’t ask for.

  54. Sorry I’m late to the party…haha, get it?! I totally understand where you’re coming from. Seriously I do. I hate popups with a passion. I too debated whether or not to have one on my blog, and decided if I hate them on other people’s blogs then I don’t want it on mine. If people want to subscribe to my posts, there’s a widget for that.
    I tried making a list of some link ups that I would be able to participate in because of what I typically blog about and almost all of them I have no idea when (what time of day) they start. I homeschool two out of three of my kids and I don’t always have time or the memory to come back and link up. I really wish most of the people who do link up parties would put in their posts when they start their parties because then I can set a reminder for myself if I want to participate that week.

    • Stephanie, I spent a good couple of days researching link parties to find out what time they start because I was so frustrated at showing up early or so late that it wasn’t worth linking up. The worst is when it’s like a Friday party but the party actually starts Thursday morning…as an example. What the friggin’ heck?
      Some of parties have a posted start time in the post but when they don’t, I had to go on when the first comments were posted. I like consistency because our home is nuts most of the time and my memory is gone most days. I keep track of everything on a google docs document. I’m thinking that maybe I should share this list in upcoming post.
      Thanks for visiting!

  55. Well since I’m the host and visiting from our Small Victories sunday Linkup, I’m glad you haven’t had to boycott us yet! I have had to institute and change rules as we go just because of the bad apples who link and run! The hosts put a lot of work into pinning and commenting and it’s really disheartening when the participants don’t support one another or the hosts since the point of our linkup is to encourage positivity, community and networking. We did institute a comment on 2 before you “rule” in hopes it’d improve engagement between participants but i’m afraid it hasn’t. Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts. And congrats on being one of our Featured Bloggers this weekend!

    • Thanks so much for the feature, Tanya! It’s hard to see that people are linking and running, I totally get that. Cindy does all of the tracking at our link party and she says the same thing. Hope you have a great weekend! See you on Sunday 🙂

  56. My first time visiting you site and found you through What to Do Weekends! You really stole my post because I was thinking of writing a post too. The top thing I hate is Linky tools, just to hard to use and time consuming. There is a huge blog that still uses it and I asked her to switch, I mean it’s only $20 a year, and she didn’t so I stopped partying with her. I also do not like pop-ups that let you know the site using “cookies” I try to get out as soon as I can…I tend to party with smaller parties it’s more intimate and I want to develop friendships, they also tend to come back and visit more. I don’t like parties who features are based on most viewed. I mean if your not in the first 50 or so people to link up your changes are pretty low, as far as I know bloggers do not come back to see who else linked up to the party. I also agree with hosts not using the link party to “highlight” what they’ve been doing, their posts etc and I feel like I am “held captive” by this. It should be about the party and not about them? I had a party for over two years and quit because it is very time consuming and I wanted to visit everyone who came and it just became impossible.

    Bloggers will continue to have pop-up and justify it and I guess they can because it’s their blog to do what they want. My blog was started after retiring for a creative outlet and do it because I enjoy it.. Thanks for your post and helping me know I am not the only one! Whew what a relief.

    • I’ve learned that we’re all feeling the same way. You hit a nerve with the “most viewed”….we do feature the most viewed but I have struggled with that concept from time to time which is why each of our hosts has their own features as well. Now and again the “most clicked link” was something I just didn’t get or want to feature because it was totally the opposite of my own belief system. Then again, I’ve been the most clicked a lot this past week and there are probably lots of bloggers wondering “What the Heck?” And you’re absolutely correct…the most viewed is usually in the first 50 links or so. Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts….we’re clearly not alone.

  57. I stumbled upon your post that was linked up to Skip The Housework Saturday. I love that you took the time to write these things out. There are so many things on this list that are reasons why I do Skip The Housework Saturday as loose as I do. No rules, No hoops, no other hosts. Just me – giving people a place to link up and grab some traffic! I am so thankful that you linked this up to the party! Thank you!


    • Hi Melanie….I link up with you every weekend if the boys are quiet enough for me to concentrate. Thanks so much for keeping your party fun and easy to enjoy!

  58. Well, I found this on our #ShareTheWealthSunday link party, so I guess you still like ours 🙂 Thanks for linking up, by the way! I totally agree with you though, I have stopped joining other link ups mainly because of pop-ups and slow- loading pages… just not worth the frustration!

    • Yup….party with you guys every weekend! Weekend parties are a bit tough for me since the boys are home from daycare and all. Like while I was trying to respond to comments this morning there have been no less than 6 crying meltdowns. (Yes, I’m counting today). Thanks for visiting and commenting this morning.

  59. Thank you! As a host for a weekly linkup, I wanted to KNOW your thoughts about linkup parties. Thank you for making and taking time to share your thoughts. They matter!

    Hugs, Susan

  60. Agreed on all points. In addition, I have one party that I used to link up to every Sunday, and the host just flat out stopped showing features. Like, really? That is what people want! the chance to be featured! You want all of the traffic and everyone to come to your party, but you don’t want to give any of them any glory for taking the time to do so. Plus she uses the annoying link up that you have to start back and the beginning every time. so I rarely visit her party anymore.

  61. Also, I hat pop up with a passion! I will not add them to my blog because I find them so very annoying. If I want to subscribe, I don’t need a pop up in my face in order to do so, I find a way to subscribe!

  62. I came across a Linky party announcement post while scrolling thru Google+ about thirty minutes ago. I clicked on it, then proceeded to view some entries. There was no particular thought put into it; I was simply enjoying the moment and delighting in viewing some of the fabulous talent and creativity that’s out there. I’m not participating in that party. I have nothing to gain. No pressure, no obligation to read the one “above”, then read the one “below”…………just pure perusing pleasure. Isn’t that how it should be? I would think that folks who enjoy linking up do so because they enjoy visiting them anyway. The operation of these parties, whether you are a host, or a guest, should be that of free will and pleasure. If it’s such a chore to host them, then don’t. If it’s such a chore to visit them, then don’t participate in them.

  63. Hi Jenna, I can’t fault one thing you’ve written in this post. I love taking part in linky parties, but like many bloggers I quickly click out if there are too many rules and I have to follow Uncle Tom Cobbley and his entire family (and read all their posts too). Link ups are a lot of work to run and I always appreciate the hosts and co-host (one is acceptable) hard efforts by following and sharing, it’s only fair, but more than two hosts is a little OTT.

    Simplicity is the key to running a good blog hop.

  64. I’m so glad somebody said this! I really don’t like when linkys specify which posts you have to comment on. There have been times when a specified post has been a lengthy review of a car seat or something that I am not in the market to buy so I have no interest in reading, or it’s been a subject that is very hard for me to engage with on a personal level such as miscarriage. I’m not a fan of having badges at the bottom of my posts but I do feel that is a courtesy to the hosts. I’ll take your tip and delete after a week or so!

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  66. This post of yours has changed my life. Because of all this validation I have dropped 50% of the link parties I was attending, eliminated all of those linky tool parties, and have moved over to smaller parties, where we can feel like human beings and not a cog in a wheel. I now spend much less time on link parties and feel that I am being recognized. Thank you so much for putting out there all the common sense things I was unable to articulate before. And for making us realize that we don’t have to be prisoners to all these rules, there are many wonderful options out there.

    • Your liberation intrigues me, Mary! I’m going to have to check out your party list to see which ones you think are the best. Thanks for being brave and inspiring!

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  69. Hi Jenna,
    I’m totally with you when it comes to having to add a link at the bottom of my post of every party I have joined. So I’ve created a page just for the link parties. The other rule that I have a problem with is having to re-pin every feature in order to be featured. I don’t eat meat and I have a shellfish allergy, so I probably would never pin those kinds of things. I joined a party that had those as features.

  70. Great post! I don’t like adding their link to my post. I mean, how many times would I have to go in and edit my post if I added everyone’s link to it? TOO MANY! Common courtesy to visit or follow the hosts and visit a few of the others linking up but that’s all I feel I should do.

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